sugarcoats and idle hearts

thank you mother, for the ticket, for giving it to me :))

you need not say nothing

neither do i

we know well enough who’s caught your eye

but there’s one thing you haven’t known

no, you have not a clue

this feeling i’ve always shown

to no one else but you..

it’s always difficult living under someone else’s spotlight. but it’s a lot more difficult living in a spot that never gets any light because something or someone else effortlessly takes it away. 

—-

when you know you deserve it and you can do it, your heart sometimes tells you “go for it!” not even thinking if it’s meant for you. well, is it? how can it be when you’re just..never enough?

the beautiful voice against the pretty face with the pretty voice definitely lost.

—-

working your ass off to accomplish something that means to you and seeing the result would’ve been enough to make you feel your hard work and sleepless night paid off. but it didn’t. don’t you wonder why?

because somebody else was seen working when she really wasn’t at all.

—-

no, i don’t like living under your spotlight.

you’ve heard of it. a million times, i know. 

you don’t force yourself to feel something for anyone. you just do. accidentally, without you knowing, you trip and you fall in love. and it feels great. the late night conversations of sweet nothings. the plans you make, the way you see things together, doing things together. the shared laughter, smiles and staring into each others eyes. falling in love feels great, indeed. 

the problem is, people don’t often realize that falling in love, is still falling which means there is an end to it. what’s worse, is that there could even be a drastic crash and you may not be able to do anything about it. nothing. but lie on the ground and regret every single minute wasted on something that made you believe something could actually last forever.

“crash!” said something i was just holding a few minutes ago.

she’s been in that box for quite a while now. no, maybe she’s been in there for far too long. too long she may not even remember how she got there.

her eyes followed her fingertips move as it traced the borders of the hollow spaces from the missing fragments of the walls. then she heard something. it was music. music as lonely as her words that were scattered on the floor. she stared at her words as she took in the music. she listened as harmony filled her head and her heart.

a smile started to form from the edge of her lips as she realized that she was not alone. that maybe, at the other side of that wall, something..someone, existed for her to belong to..the way her words were meant for that music.

he smiles and she can’t help but stare. he laughs and she hears music. he plays the strings to her heart and she falls. he sings, and she falls even harder.

he called out someone else’s name and she was crushed. her chest burned and was ripped open by a screaming, pounding, crying heart. trying to catch her breath she stole a glance once again and saw that smile. with eyes closed she listened to that voice for the last time. 

and she walked away.